The Power of Externalization
What is Externalization?
“You are not your label.” I say this phrase often in the therapy room, as well as to parents and caregivers of loved ones battling mental illness. While mental health diagnoses have their place for proper treatment, these diagnoses can carry heavy emotional and psychological implications. A person can easily feel defined by their diagnostic label, which can therefore impact their self-esteem and overall worth.
A person’s mental illness can become the defining marker of their character. I encourage clients, parents, and caregivers to separate or externalize the mental illness from the person. Narrative therapists Michael White and David Epston write,
“The problem is the problem, the person is not the problem.”
We do not define a person by their cancer diagnosis or Alzheimer’s. In fact, we often remember and reflect on their tenacity as they battle these life threatening diseases. Mental health might have different treatment modalities, but it is still an illness someone is battling. Externalizing is a powerful way to reframe the mental illness for what it is… a disease, not the essence of the person. When the illness manifests, it can help caregivers to recognize that the symptoms they are witnessing are the illness and not their child or loved one.
Practical Ways to Externalize a Mental Health Illness
Through externalization, we can focus on the individuals’ strengths in battling their mental health struggle and empower them to overcome.
When working alongside younger clients, I will often have them draw what they believe their illness looks like - such as anxiety or depression. They might draw a big monster and give it a name. Hypothetically, we might pretend this character is sitting on their shoulder and whispering negative thoughts in their mind or heart. Then, we’ll talk about ways to quiet this character and defeat him once and for all. For instance, let’s replace every one of his negative words with a positive. We can unify as a team against the illness versus the illness carrying significant power over the individual.
Love the Person Behind the Label
Externalizing empowers individuals, couples and families to fight the battle together and recognize the power they were assigning to the label, versus the person underneath. When we externalize, we are able to soften and love the person behind the label through their pain. The individual can walk confidently that they are fighting a battle and they have the support/strength to overcome. This battle does not define their worth or their future.
If you or someone you love is feeling defined by a mental health label today, remember that you are fighting an illness. This is not indicative of the person you are inside. In fact, your battle can be your greatest strength and a powerful chapter in your life story. Externalize today and team up against the mental battle you are facing.
Additional Resources:
What’s the Problem? By: Sabine Vermeire, William Beckers, Kris Decraemer & Maiele Faes
Narrative Means to Therapeutic Ends By: Michael White & David Epston
The Institute of Narrative Therapy
